I cannot easily describe how shocked and worried Herbert was when I told him the whole secret. As we sat before the fire with Provis, I saw my own feelings reflected in Herbert’s face. Most of all, I saw the same look of disgust toward the man who had done so much for me.
The thing that separated us from him most was his pride in my success. Except for a brief moment when he felt he had been "low" or common, he was completely happy. He truly believed that I should be proud of the fortune he had given me. He sat there, boasting about how he had made me a gentleman.
"Look here, Pip’s comrade," he said to Herbert. "I know I acted a bit common for a minute when I first arrived. But don't worry. I know how to behave around gentlemen like you. I will stay quiet and on my best behavior from now on."
Herbert said, "Certainly," but he looked very uncomfortable. We were both waiting for Provis to go to his own lodgings so we could talk alone. However, Provis seemed jealous of our friendship and stayed until midnight. Finally, I walked him to his door in Essex Street. When the door closed behind him, I felt relieved for the first time in days.
When I returned, Herbert received me with open arms. I had never felt so lucky to have such a good friend. After he spoke some kind words to comfort me, we sat down to ask the most important question: What should we do?
"What can we do, Herbert?" I asked, holding my head in my hands. "I am too shocked to think."
"Something must be changed," Herbert agreed. "He wants to spend even more money on you—horses, carriages, and expensive things. You have to stop him."
"How can I accept anything else from him?" I cried. "Look at who he is! Think of where the money comes from!" We both shuddered at the thought. "Yet, the terrible truth is that he is deeply attached to me. He loves me like a son."
"My poor friend," Herbert said softly.
"If I stop taking his money now, I still owe him so much," I continued. "And I am heavily in debt. I have no job and I have learned no skills. I am fit for nothing."
"Don't say that," Herbert encouraged me. "You could work with me at Clarriker’s office." (He did not know, of course, that it was my secret money that had started that business.)
"But there is another problem," Herbert said. "This man is dangerous. He is fierce and determined. He has spent years dreaming of this moment. If you reject him now, he might become reckless. He might even let himself be caught by the police just because he doesn't care anymore."
This idea horrified me. If he were caught and hanged because of my actions, I would feel like a murderer. I began to walk up and down the room. I realized I would feel guilty even if he were caught by accident. I would have preferred to work at Joe’s forge for the rest of my life than to be in this terrible situation.
"The first thing we must do," Herbert said, "is to get him out of England. You will have to go with him. Only then will he agree to leave."
"But where would we go? And how can I stop him from coming back?"
"It is too dangerous here," Herbert insisted. "Newgate Prison is just a few streets away. We must find a reason to get him away from London."
"I know nothing about his life," I said. "It makes me feel crazy to sit here with him every night, knowing he controls my future, yet knowing nothing about his past. I only know he terrified me when I was a child."
Herbert stood up and walked with me. "Handel, are you sure you can't take any more money from him?"
"I am sure," I replied.
"And you are sure you must break your connection with him?"
"I must."
"Then you must save his life first," Herbert said firmly. "Get him out of England before you do anything else. Once he is safe, you can leave him. We will figure it out together."
We shook hands on this plan. It was a small comfort to have a goal.
"Now," I said, "I need to know his history. I will ask him tomorrow at breakfast."
The next morning, Provis arrived for breakfast. He was already making big plans for me to move into a "fashionable house" near the park. When he finished eating and was wiping his knife on his leg, I spoke to him.
"After you left last night, I told Herbert about the fight you had with the other convict on the marshes. Do you remember?"
"Remember!" he said. "I certainly do!"
"We want to know more about that man—and about you," I said. "We want to know your story."
Provis looked at Herbert. "You swore an oath, Pip’s comrade?"
"I did," Herbert replied.
Magwitch put his pipe away and sat quietly for a moment, looking at the fire. Then he looked at us and began to speak.