Alice stood near the small house. Suddenly, a footman (a servant in a large house) ran out of the woods. He wore livery (a special uniform for a servant). He had a face like a fish. He knocked loudly on the door.
Another footman opened the door. This one had a face like a frog. Both footmen had white hair. Alice hid in the woods to listen to them.
The Fish-Footman had a very large letter. He gave the letter to the Frog-Footman. He said, "An invitation for the Duchess (a very important woman) to play croquet (a game where you hit balls through hoops)." The footmen bowed and then they got their hair stuck together.
Alice laughed and ran back into the trees. When she looked again, the Fish-Footman was gone. The Frog-Footman sat on the ground. He looked at the sky.
Alice went to the door and knocked. The Frog-Footman said, "It is no use to knock." He said he was outside with Alice. He also said it was very noisy inside. Alice heard people screaming and sneezing. She heard dishes breaking too.
Alice asked, "How do I get in?" The Frog-Footman did not answer. He looked at the sky. Suddenly, a large plate flew out of the house. It almost hit the Frog-Footman’s nose. He did not move. Alice was angry because the Frog-Footman was not helping. She opened the door and went in.
The door led to a kitchen. The room was full of smoke. The Duchess sat on a stool and held a baby. The cook was busy with a large pot of soup. There was a lot of pepper (a hot spice that makes you sneeze) in the air.
Everyone was sneezing except the cook. There was also a large cat on the floor. The cat had a very big grin (a very wide smile). Alice asked the Duchess, "Why does your cat smile like that?"
The Duchess said, "It is a Cheshire Cat." Then she shouted, "Pig!" Alice was surprised. But the Duchess was talking to the baby, not to Alice. The cook started throwing pots and pans at the Duchess. The Duchess did not care.
The Duchess began to sing a song to the baby. It was not a nice song. She shook the baby very hard. Then she threw the baby at Alice. The Duchess said, "You hold it! I must go play croquet." Then the Duchess left the room.
Alice took the baby outside. The baby was very strange. It began to grunt. Alice looked at its face. Its nose was like a snout (the long nose of an animal). Its eyes were very small.
Alice realized the baby was now a pig! She put the little pig on the ground. It ran away into the woods. Alice thought, "It was an ugly baby, but it is a nice pig."
Alice saw the Cheshire Cat in a tree. The Cat grinned at her. Alice asked, "Which way should I go?" The Cat said, "That depends on where you want to go." Alice said she did not care.
The Cat said, "Then it does not matter." He told Alice that a Hatter lives in one direction. He said a March Hare lives in the other direction. The Cat said, "They are both mad."
Alice said, "I do not want to meet mad people." The Cat said, "Everyone here is mad. I am mad and you are mad." Alice did not believe him. But the Cat vanished into the air.
The Cat appeared again and asked about the baby. Alice said, "It turned into a pig." The Cat said, "I thought so." Then the Cat began to disappear very slowly. His tail went first. His face went last. Finally, only his grin was left in the air.
Alice walked toward the house of the March Hare. The house was very strange. The chimneys looked like ears. The roof was covered in fur. Alice ate a bit of the mushroom. She became two feet tall. She was ready to meet the March Hare.